Suddenly I came to my senses....

In our new parent glow and awe at our beautiful boy, Nick and I had decided that having a new baby right away would be great - double the fun, right? Thankfully we've come out of the psychosis and decided maybe not so much fun. I have had two days of feeling crappy and it sparked something in my brain to remind me of how crappy I felt while I was pregnant. There was the non-stop morning sickness in my first trimester, the arthritis flair-ups, the so tired all I can do is sleep all day. That does not sound like something I want to tackle along with Tristan starting to talk, walk, eat, you know, all the basics.

A part of me is sad about the decision, it almost feels like if we don't just let nature takes it course, then maybe when we do decide we want another one it just won't happen. I have to remind myself it's not a now or never kind of thing though.

Right now I want to enjoy all of Tristan's milestones, relish in having free time when he sleeps in and naps during the day, and focus on this new house. Nick started to worry that if I got pregnant right away we wouldn't be able to go to England in the spring, it would be another hellish moving scenario with me not being able to lift anything, and landscaping the new yard would be a one man job. These were all things that we were looking forward to doing together, so now we don't have to stress about it.

And who knows, maybe in the next year I can get myself back to a size 4 and feel like myself again (I can dream, right?)